Monday, May 01, 2006

My Hero

Saturday Madeleine had a playdate. It was beautiful and warm and her friend lives in a gorgeous home with a tree fort and all of the toys ever made in the whole world. Will. Her friend is Will, remember? Later she told me Will's two lovely older sisters dressed her up in some kind of fairy dress with a crown and told her she was a queen. Needless to say, she was in a coma of love and fairy enchantment when I showed up to take her home. Oh, and they had all walked a couple blocks to get ice cream right before I got there too. She was not happy to be told it was time to leave. By not happy, I mean screaming at the top of her lungs and running from me and throwing her flip flops in the pond. Um, Will's daddy? Can you turn around for a minute so you can't see the flames shooting from my nostrils while I stuff her into her carseat? The only thing that dampened the screaming and invectives was a promise to go to Million Trillion. Short for Million Trillion Video Store. You know, Blockbuster?

Phew! Hopefully Blockbuster is okay with half-naked Wild Childs, I say to myself. Because who knows where the hell the flip flops went, and Tiny's shirt was somehow torn off in the carseat struggle. Apparently they were, because we finally made it to the counter with Lilo and Stitch and something else (no matter what I said, she wouldn't be convinced that Good Night, Good Luck was a kids' movie). "Hi, uh, Mig-NON. It says here you have a $54 late fee." Um, huh? Fifty-four dollars? "Yes, fifty-four dollars. For P.S. and The Upside of Anger." Ha-ha, are you teasing me? About the Anger thing? "Teasing you? No, I'm not teasing. I'm only twelve years old with a premature pot-belly and terrible posture from my X-box addiction. I don't tease." Okay, dude, I need to talk to the manager. "Okay, uh-huh, uh-huh, TODDDDD!!!" I turn to the woman behind me and shrug and apologize. She smiles with understanding and says, "They really should be able to give you more information. Dates or something." Why yes, I think, they SHOULD dammit. I'm not sure what that would do, but I SHOULD be able to get some dates or something.

So fifteen minutes later, Todd is still starely quizzically at the computer, Quinn has completely mauled the box of popcorn and eaten 3 packets of raw kernels, Madeleine is naked climbing the sucker tower and the woman behind me has not moved to the other line, despite my urging to do so. They cut my late fee in half and are in the process of renting my movies, when finally the other line has gone away and the woman standing behind me moves to the next register. She hands the 12-year-old her movies and says in a low voice, with a nice smile, "Here, I'm giving you these movies back. I will be shopping at your competitor from now on. Not only did you not provide that woman with important information when asked to do so, but you should have helped me after it was apparent she would be taking a while. That is very poor customer service and I won't be shopping here anymore." Now tell me, isn't that the coolest? How many of you would've fumed in silent fury and thrown a complete tantrum in your car on the way home? Todd was non-plussed, when I asked him if he'd heard, but I'm making that woman my own personal hero of the week. You Go, lady in the jean capris and cream colored blouse! You GO!


Anonymous TB said...

That is super cool. I doubt I would pull that off, preferring to slam the videos down on the counter and leave in a huff.

Also, when you mentioned poor posture, I immediately straightened up in my chair.

5/01/2006 10:01 AM  
Anonymous V-Grrrl said...

I'm still laughing because the movie in question was The Upside of Anger. Damn, of all the movies to be a charged a late fee for, that's got to be least worthy. That was the most painful movie to watch--I just hated it, hated that bitch woman, hated the way she treated her kids. I was just completely depressed when I finished watching it. There was no upside!

5/01/2006 10:07 AM  
Blogger Tink said...

"Also, when you mentioned poor posture, I immediately straightened up in my chair." *Snort* Holy shit Teebs, me too!

Rock on with the powerful females. I like that kind of attitude much better than the old lady standing behind me at Belks yesterday. Instead of politely complaining about the wait she loudly proclaimed that "This place is full of cheap crap with shitty employees and I refuse to spend one cent at this establishment." Then the line next to me moved and she hopped in to buy her capris.

5/01/2006 10:49 AM  
Blogger wordgirl said...

I dream of days where I've got enough guts to start a confrontation like that one. Hero, indeed!

5/01/2006 11:12 AM  
Blogger Elizabeth said...

I thought Blockbuster did away with late fees. At least the ones here did. Now you get like two weeks and then they just charge the purchase price of the DVD to your credit card. Does your Blockbuster not do that? Hmmm.

And, yes, that lady rocks for saying that, but I wonder if she'll really never shop there again. I mean, it's Blockbuster. They're everywhere.

5/01/2006 11:40 AM  
Blogger Jaye Wells said...

What she said is the kind of thing I usually think of about fifteen minutes after I'm home.

May she be an inspiration to us all!

It reminds me of Fried Green Tomatos (toes? I can never remeber) where Kathy Bates slams into the chick in the sports car who just stole her parking spot.

"Because I'm older and I have better insurance!"

5/01/2006 12:51 PM  
Anonymous stella said...

this is the kind of stuff the newspaper dudes need to hear.


I especially enjoyed hearing about Quinn going thru the popcorn kernels. that is awesome.

maybe there is something to be said about jean capris after all...

5/01/2006 2:23 PM  
Blogger Arabella said...

That lady rocks! And you rock, too, Mignon. You were very polite to her. It's good to hear about two strangers being nice to each other.

5/01/2006 3:27 PM  
Anonymous letterb said...

Blockbuster is on my permanent list. As God is my witness, I shall never rent from them again. They actually got a collection agency to go after me for a $13 fine. I had no idea I owed them anything and suddenly I'm getting threatening mail from Texas. This was 8 years ago and I have not stepped foot in a Blockbuster since. That woman is also my hero. Righteous blockbuster-busters unite!

5/01/2006 5:11 PM  
Anonymous honestyrain said...

oh now that woman is the here of us all. atta girl, i say to her. atta girl!

5/01/2006 5:47 PM  
Blogger Dawn said...

Yeah, I love when some one does some really cool shit and I think "I wish I'd thought of that - cause that rocked"

But usually, I am exhausted to the point of tears and want to beat the shit out of someone.

5/01/2006 6:34 PM  
Blogger Jess Riley said...

I love people who can do that. I definitely would have been fuming in silent fury & throwing a tantrum in the car later part. Oh, and blogging about it even later. :)

5/01/2006 9:30 PM  
Anonymous DD said...

would make me scared to rent Anger Management.

We rented Upside of Anger here and found it interesting and good - but not great. For some reason they changed the title in Germany to "On Your Shoulder".

We have seen other strange changes like this before (Married with Children became "A Beautiful Horrible Family"). WTF??? Maybe they run potential titles past German test audiences?

5/01/2006 11:09 PM  
Blogger mama_tulip said...

What happened to the whole "no more late fees" campaign I thought Blockbuster had?

5/02/2006 8:17 AM  
Anonymous Nancy said...

Netflix, baby! It's the way to go!

Seriously, that woman does rock. If I'd been there I would have kissed her, hard, on the lips.

Forgive me, I just ate a brownie and I'm in chocolate purgatory, I don't know what my hands are typing.

5/02/2006 5:40 PM  
Blogger Mignon said...

Chocolate PURGATORY? I thought that was the 7 Levels of Hell in which There IS NO CHOCOLATE.

I loved Netflix, but found myself renting only movies that I felt I should watch, instead of Weekend at Bernies 2 and anything Alicia Silverstone was ever in (meaning movies that I will watch). Plus they got bought by Wal-Mart, I think, and that's a big no-no in my mind.

The End of Late Fees deal was a huge scam. It was the Blockbuster equivalent of Netflix and had nothing to do with in-store rentals (unless you sign up for the in-store rental movie club which is, like, $300 a week or something). I think there was even a lawsuit about it and Blockbuster had to pull the ads.

And LetterB - Todd told me the collections threat is pure posturing and that they never do it (I've received those letters too). In fact, my $54 late fee was actually classified as a "Write-Off" because I ignored the collections threat. Okay, I didn't ignore it, but I did put it at the bottom of the bills pile along with my Horticulture Monthly renewal letter and forgot totally about it.

5/02/2006 7:39 PM  

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