Monday, January 02, 2006


Not really a -palooza here, but I have seen a lot of memes floating around recently. I love them, as they provide a reason for gazing into space and thinking about me. In fact, I think I'll start mentally calling them ME!ME!s. So here's one MamaT threw my way:

5 Weird Things About Myself

1. I can't burp. No air ever escapes my throat, which causes my belly to swell up like a bullfrog when I drink beer. It's a great party trick.

2. I can't remember the last time I clipped my fingernails. My teeth are perfectly suited for the job, and although chewing nails is ostensibly a bad habit, mine actually look very nice. And I don't have to file them this way, either (filing nails is so stinky!).

3. I used to be a chemical engineer. Yes, this is a strange enough tidbit I thought about making it stand alone. But actually, the strange part is I have a terrible memory for numbers and scientific data.

4. I love huge crowds. Like the mall on extremely busy shopping days, or waiting in line at the DMV. They afford ample
people-watching and the thought of being jostled around by hundreds of people I don't know is vaguely exciting.

5. I once bruised my kneecap playing football, and the swelling was so bad, my leg was purple from my toes to my hip. This is not an exaggeration. The funny part was, when the swelling finally went down, I peed and peed and peed, as if the fluid went straight from my leg to my bladder.

Now I'm going to tag Everyone!! This one is too fun, so if you're reading, consider yourself tagged.


Anonymous honestyrain said...

can't burp??? but you can fart, right? else you'd blow up like a big balloon!

1/02/2006 9:21 AM  
Blogger mama_tulip said...

Ouch. My kneecap is sympathetically aching.

1/02/2006 11:47 AM  
Blogger DebbieDoesLife said...

Those are definately weird, I'll give ya that.

Chemical Engineer? You are way smarter than me that's for sure.

1/02/2006 12:03 PM  
Blogger Arabella said...

Wow, you are an interesting person. This is a very fun meme.

1/02/2006 1:30 PM  
Blogger wordgirl said...

That'll be tomorrow's post for me. Can't burp? Man...I burp like a longshoreman.

1/02/2006 1:34 PM  
Blogger Mignon said...

Oh yes, I can fart. And fart I do. I've found that standing on my head makes the real stubborn ones come out.
And the engineer=smart theory is totally false. I've worked with more than my fair share of idiots. Just because they could read a book and take a test doesn't mean they can carry on a conversation or even dress themselves. I believe there is a lot of undiagnosed autism in the scientific world.

1/02/2006 2:12 PM  
Blogger Orange said...

I bruised my kneecap two years ago tripping on the oak floor. I didn't have your impressive swelling, but that fucker still hurts sometimes. Like, when I cross my legs and my other calf rests on the kneecap, suddenly there is gasping and cursing.

I am a world-champion burper, both real ones and fake/induced, but my husband can't fake a burp (any carbonated drink makes him burp like a fiend...a belching fiend). My son has, fortunately, inherited my gift.

1/02/2006 2:21 PM  
Blogger Shrinking Violet said...

Peeing out a bruise! Now that is a party trick! Okay, so a Meme is something where I fill in the blanks to the questions? So, I should find (only) five things that are weird about me? Okay, it will be tomorrow's blog.

1/02/2006 3:08 PM  
Anonymous Nancy said...

I can burp on demand. And I can't stand crowds. Maybe we are polar opposites?

1/02/2006 6:05 PM  
Anonymous TB said...

My husband, who also has an engineering degree read this post before me and reported back.
He was duly impressed that you were a chemical engineer as well as with your self proclaimed farting skills. That's a feat in and of itself as I am the Queen of Gas.

1/02/2006 7:07 PM  
Blogger Plain Jane said...

I love the ME!ME! twist!

1/02/2006 7:19 PM  
Blogger Mignon said...

Orange, my knee never hurts now. You probably did some kind of real and not just colorful injury to yourself.
Nancy, you and my husband. He'll never go to the mall with me and the combination of his burps and my farts after a particular onion-y meal is probably flammable.
Teebs, no way are you the Queen of Gas. That's ME!

1/02/2006 8:19 PM  
Blogger Montana1 said...

I have to agree with the autism comment. My dad is the most brilliant person I have ever met, a certifiable genius. The man, however, has no social skills, can't carry on a normal conversation and has to have his wardrobe chosen by his wife. Oy. I think I've heard you fart at soccer...

1/03/2006 5:55 AM  
Anonymous kathie said...

Thanks so much for stopping at my site! I love yours. Your list is awesome. Can't burp? That'd be a real gas as far as party tricks go. I love that you love crowds. Me too. As long as I'm not trying to actually "do" something while immersed in a crowd. But just being in one? Oh the wonderful humanity!

1/03/2006 12:14 PM  
Blogger Brooke said...

OK...number 4?

You must have LOVED the holidays!

1/03/2006 2:07 PM  
Blogger The Gradual Gardener said...

I can't burb easily either, but if I force myself to yawn really big, sometimes it'll end as a burb. That's also how I get my ears to pop on airplanes. Farting, however, is not a problem!

1/03/2006 2:32 PM  
Anonymous 1 of 2 Dads in Dresden said...

Aren't we supposed to leave our list of 5 here? Hope so...

5 Weird Things. (Remember though - that weirdness, like beauty, is in the eye of the beholder.)

1. I have eaten the same breakfast cereal for the past 10 months (some exceptions on weekend mornings), and I'm not at all tired of it or disposed to change.

2. I have read the entire Bible, was baptised in the Holy Spirit and was a member of a fundamentalist baptist church. (None of which changed my sexual orientation.)

3. There is a first-degree arson arrest record in my name, and I was questioned as a suspect in a women's health clinic firebombing (see 2, above). For the record: in high school I did blow up several things in the community, but did not firebomb the clinic.

4. In junior high I obsessively clicked my thumb knuckles, and finally cured myself with two thumb splints.

5. My same-sex marriage and our family seem to be just as ordinary as the heterosexual kind.

1/04/2006 2:54 AM  
Blogger Mignon said...

Gardener, that's an excellent idea! I'm going to try it tonight (beer and Rose Bowl).
1 of 2, are you trying to be anonymous or can I call you by name? And I knew all that stuff already, except for #4! But I guess my B-list buddies don't know you like I do.

1/04/2006 1:47 PM  
Anonymous 1 of 2 Dads in Dresden said...

No problem with the real name… Mark is fine. I've commented on some other blogs with this 1 of 2 moniker (mostly

Yes, I knew Mignon when she was an engineer. One day too, I shall also be free...

1/04/2006 10:44 PM  

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