If You Read This and Feel Confused, Welcome!

I just drove my dad to the airport after he and Jim's whirlwind romance of a weekend. They spent 48 hours in our cold dark basement making love. Har har, no, just wiring the new room. We only had one visit to the emergency room (dad nearly cut the tip of his finger off because he can't see very well and should never be given a razor blade), two crying spells (one by Madeleine when I wouldn't watch Rudolph with her during the scary Abominbabonabmable Snowman parts and one by me last night for no real reason except that we were out of apple juice), eight inches of snow, and much cooped-up inside with the same two holiday CDs on repeat kind-of angst. But yay! The room has Pow-ah! Next is insulation, sheetrock, paint, carpet and much cheap accessorizing by me. I love cheap accessorizing, except my Major Pet Peeve is art purchased at furniture stores or other such generic non-art-ish locales. Like hotel art? It can seriously throw me into a funk just to look at the poorly drawn fruit and seascapes. I'd rather the previous occupant puke all over the walls then draw pictures in it with shaking hung-over fingers than look at the hein stuff mass produced by first-year art students from that school in the back of comic books (where you have to copy the cartoon of the turtle head and send it in with $800,000 to be accepted into their elite program).
My other pet peeve today? Reading Rainbow. LeVar Burton, if he's going to act in anything at all, should always have to wear that harmonica thing on his head like he does in Star Trek. Because otherwise his googly eyes and cloying earnestness while reading childrens books is just a little too "special." I don't really know what I mean by (finger-quotes) special. Just that he is. And it bugs me. And also today I'm not liking Christmas music with no words. I'll stop now, though.
I am now thinking good thoughts. Mostly about cookies and babies that say Ya-Ya repetitively while jutting out their two itty-bitty Chicklet teeth.

And PS: Does anyone know where baby Emma was in the final episode of Friends, because I just saw the re-run and it seemed like everyone forgot about her! Did Rachel forget her? I haven't forgotten her!