Monday, December 10, 2007

Much Ado about Birthdays

I just won something on ebay. It was just like those commercials and there was a lot of shouting and arm-waving and cheers and champagne crashing on the helms of boats and black fists raised at Hitler and so forth. It were rocks. I won some rocks.

Jim built a climbing wall in the backyard this weekend (foreplay for Missoulians) for Madeleine's birthday. Please quit with the eyerolling. It's unbecoming. Yes. We built our daughter who hates climbing and heights a climbing wall to mock her. Ha ha ha you little shit! Climb THIS!

No. That's not it. She likes it now. Apparently she climbs up to the top of the climbing wall in PE every Monday and Thursday (except Thursdays in which the week is shortened wherein PE will be replaced with a long after-lunch recess and all of the parents look at their watches at 2:05 and go Oh Shit! it's early-out! and then we rush to pick up our kids with their little brothers and sisters half-dressed and missing a mitten and complaining that they have to pee. Which is why on those Thursdays a lot of little brothers and sisters pee behind the sandbox in a corner of the playground.) AND she jumps off the wall backwards while doing macrame and humming the Hungarian National Anthem. Which is to say, she seems to have overcome her fear. In PE.

When the ebay rocks come, we'll see how she does at home. Also, apparently, we'll see how she likes getting rocks for her birthday. And I already know I will be mocked for this at family dinners for the rest of my life. Much in the way my mom is mocked for allowing the tooth fairy to give my brother a banana. Under his pillow.


Blogger V-Grrrl said...

The tooth fairy gave your brother a banana? Now that's one for the therapist's couch.

I think rocks rock as a gift. How many girls her age get Barbies? How many get their own rock-climbing walls? Yeah, she's cool, she's strong, and she's on her way up.

12/11/2007 5:22 AM  
Blogger meno said...

What i find odd is that your husband built your daughter a foreplay device. That's just wrong!

12/11/2007 2:18 PM  
Blogger Jess Riley said...

You cracked me up with your mocking "Climb THIS!"

And what's this about a banana under a pillow? :)

12/11/2007 10:02 PM  
Blogger lildb said...

a) banana under a pillow. awesome.

b) I'm so proud of M, even if my pride only applies to recess.

c) god. M's school has a rock-climbing wall. that's damn progressive.

d) my palms are all sweaty, now. great.

12/11/2007 10:42 PM  
Blogger Jaye Wells said...

I love your mom so much right now. That's awesome.

And she'll love the rocks. At least they're colorful.

12/12/2007 8:43 AM  
Blogger Tink said...

You know, ususally when I write LOL it's because I'm mentally laughing and crying. Which really sounds like something I should get checked out. But imagining the "tooth fairy" giving a banana for a tooth just made me LITERALLY LOL. LITERALLY. Do you see what you do to me?

12/14/2007 6:04 AM  
Anonymous Mitch said...

Are rocks for a birthday some sort of equivalent to coal for Christmas?

12/17/2007 7:46 PM  
Blogger Mignon said...

Oh hey. I forgot about how responding to comments is fun, so...

V-Grrrl, you hit the nail on the head. Somewhere there's a very lonely therapist, waiting for this guy to never show up. Madeleine tried out her wall today and found it suitable to her needs.

Meno, you know we try to give our kids what we never had...

Jess, hi! I missed you.

Debbie, Madeleine's school is the best school in the world, hands down. Except her class has a turtle. That part's not my favorite.

Jaye, You are right. She likes the purple one and now it's the grand-matriarch of the rock family.

Tink, you should have been there to see his expression when he found it in the morning.

Mitch, hey. 'Sup? Apparently no, about the coal. Unless coal is a really fun play-thing that can be bolted to a large slab of plywood for enjoyable and healthy outdoor activities.

12/18/2007 4:20 PM  
Blogger Mitch said...

Ya know, about the coal - Last year I saw a Baby Blues comic where the two kids wanted everything for Christmas and their parents told them if they continued to be so greedy, they'd get coal. When the kids asked what coal was the dad said it's a rock that you can burn.
The kids immediately decided they had to have burning rocks for Christmas, so I guess climbing rocks are just as cool.

12/19/2007 6:10 PM  
Blogger Eliza said... ROCK! Heh, rock. Hee? Fine, be that way. Love the black fists upraised, the purple grandmatriarchal rock, and also, "Missoulans?" I ask because your blog is the only place I've ever heard the term, and I'm scratching my head trying to figure out if there is a GROUP, of people living in Missoula who DO NOT KNOW EACH OTHER but who nevertheless have THINGS, things that they all DO, in much the same manner as the Wisconsins all get together and hold long fake teeth-gritting smiles in groups, even when they simply just hear the dialect from across an airport Applebee's and are instantly the best of friends. More likely you're saying something to your peeps who read the blog locally, but my tits, they shall not be un-itillated.

12/21/2007 11:11 AM  
Blogger Phil BC said...

Hmmm, rocks on ebay, hmmm. Must give it a try sometime. Anyone want some bona fide english rocks?

12/22/2007 8:28 AM  
Blogger Mignon said...

Mitch, I miss Baby Blues. We have crappy comics - every day I read A Rose Is a Rose and I say Dammit!! I will never read that piece of crap again! And then I do the next day. I miss Foxtrot too. I think that guy retired.

Eliza, You mean the loaded moniker of Missoulian doesn't translate around the world? Hmm. I guess I'll have to elaborate another day. But to clarify, No. There aren't any Missoulians that Do the Same Thing but don't know each other.

Phil BC, sure, I'd like me a pair of English Rocks - you bet. Slightly smaller than their American counterparts, right?

12/23/2007 8:13 AM  
Blogger Ortizzle said...

Rocks are good. In fact, rocks rock.

Now, about that banana... you so have to tell us the rest of that story. Go on. Peel away.

Meantime: Merry Christmas!

12/24/2007 10:12 AM  

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