Friday, May 23, 2008

Good Times

I'm playing in a tennis tournament tomorrow, perhaps. It's been raining steadily for the past couple days, and will likely continue through my 9 am match. Which means it will be rescheduled and I will sit on the couch eating the kids' leftover chocolate chip pancakes and reading the comics. Which, hello? Saturday? I love you. Even you, boring afternoon hours, where the kids fight and I'm sick of all the CDs in our 300-disc changer. I even have a little crush on you.

Today I got a rejection e-mail. Nothing unusual there, except for it coming 9 DAYS AFTER MY SUBMISSION. So I guess they didn't like my name and address? Hmmm, Mignon. Sounds like a bitch. And what the hell? She lives on a street?? Fucking loser! REJECTED! That's how I imagine it goes at literary magazine these days. A bunch of former homecoming queen runner-ups at a lunch table picking through the literary offerings of the Latin Club. It makes me feel better, anyway. Because I know what the homecoming queen runner-ups thought of me. They thought I was a foreign exchange student, that's what. And no, in Kelso, Washington, that doesn't get you any play. It gets you the opposite of play. Friday nights playing Yahtzee with your 8-year-old brother. That's the opposite of play. Oh, and you lose, too. And you never get any Yahtzees or the fucking large straight, which is the biggest pain-in-the-ass category. Which is why tonight, in remembrance, we played a little Yahtzee. And I still didn't get Yahtzee or the Fucking Large Straight, but I still kicked Madeleine's ass. Ha ha! Take that crappy Texas State MFA Literary Magazine! Texas. Snort. Whatever. Huh.

Here's the fruits of our spring labor (all safe-for-work, in case that sounded overly intriguing):




9 Comments:

Blogger Bob said...

screw them and their plastic tiaras. we know they're just haters anyway.

keep trying, mignon.

5/23/2008 7:25 PM  
Blogger Feral Mom said...

What Bob said. I personally think that people named Mignon who live on streets are awesome. And I feel you-- I once got rejected with the salutation, "Dear Writer." They might as well have said "Dear Loser." Classy!

5/23/2008 8:17 PM  
Blogger Denice said...

At least you recognize, they probably could not get past the fact that when you wrote your name on the envelope, you did not put a heart about the letter i and did not even glance at the contents. I know it must be hard, but I am glad you keep going.

I hope the next batch of submissions go to people who did not get their writing degree from a college endorsed by Sally Struthers.

5/23/2008 9:51 PM  
Blogger spellconjurer said...

Boxing. Rocky Balboa. Cheesy yet true. "It's not about how hard you hit, it's about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward". You rule.

5/24/2008 3:32 AM  
Anonymous Janet O'C said...

Mignon - I'm so glad you're back blogging because it's hysterical -- hey, could you email me? janetmooreoconnor@comcast.net - I need to get connected, but left all my email address on my work email. Muahhh!!!
Jan

5/27/2008 7:40 AM  
Blogger Tink said...

Maybe the person in charge of reading all the entries had a melt down and all their marbles rolled away. Because seriously, how can he/she not see that you rock?!

5/28/2008 2:05 PM  
Anonymous Daneman said...

Love the Rocky quote, but if it held water then Tex Cobb would have won and held a belt for decades. How about Mike Tyson: "Everyone has a plan until they get hit in the face." I hope blogging isn't settling into plan B. No one gives shit like an older brother...

6/03/2008 1:29 PM  
Blogger Stella said...

wow...impressive WALL you got there!!! Zack would be proud.

so um. the large straight. BLOWS.

i second that. its one of our favorite 'get shitty and make bets' game. next to mancala.

also - so does this mean that a FRENCH name such as Amelie for our cracker ass american (unborn, unconceived) child - would not be good?

6/04/2008 10:49 AM  
Blogger V-Grrrl said...

Texans just have issues with Montana because they know that's where real ranchers, cowboys, and writers come from.

Why be ashamed that don't live in a PO box? I mean, c'mon, how white trash is living at the PO? ; )

With a name like Mignon, everyone should be tearing the envelopes open hoping for erotica. Hey, don't laugh, think of Anais Nin. She went FAR--in every sense of the word.

6/09/2008 7:43 PM  

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