Wednesday, February 08, 2006

The Endorsement

I have several magazine subscriptions and because life doesn't allow me to sit and read for two straight hours, which is my usual m.o., magazines are the perfect medium for my life. And as such, I typically read them cover to cover over the span of a month. My old fave was Jane, but I finally gave up on their fashion and beauty train-wreck sections because they're not of this world, in a stand on the street corner and yell about Jesus, kind of way. Or heinous. Or just im-fucking-possible. Note:

This is ugly right? Or is there something wrong with me? I've come to terms with the fact that knowing what the back-pocket stitching should look like on a pair of Silver jeans does not make me a complete person. And, Jane staffers? Inside jokes are annoying and off-putting.

So obviously that was not the Endorsement part of this post... But this is:

I love Esquire. Okay, it panders to my liberal, sharply-dressed man loving side, but I'm willing to acknowledge that and move on. These are the reasons I read this magazine every time I poop:

1) Esquire typically has at least one very well known and respected writer in each issue: Chuck Pahlinchulinichuk (whatever - you know, the Fight Club guy), David Sedaris, Saul Bellow, the guy who wrote Adaptation, etc.

2) Men's fashion is so much easier, cleaner, and less complicated than women's fashion. I understand why a three-button suit is exactly right. It makes sense that you don't wear brown shoes with a grey suit (have you ever seen decomposing dog poop?). And ties! So cute! This is what I'm talkin about...

3) Viggo Mortensen is on the cover. Viggo traveled 1500 miles to Crawford, Texas one morning to tell Cindy Sheehan that he admired what she doing. He chatted for 30 minutes, then flew home the same day so he could pick up his son from school.

4) It's snobby, but in an old-money way. You just don't get good, old-money snobbery on the west coast. And clever and guy-snarky (Take note: that is the first and last time I will ever use that word.)

5) It's not afraid to advertisers that do this, whatever it means:


Anonymous TB said...

Yummy. I like to read Details every now and then. It's like Cosmo. for men but I could never get Jeff to dress in the clothes that they feature.

2/08/2006 10:03 AM  
Anonymous Nancy said...

You don't like that outfit in the top picture? That's what I wear to do the ironing at home. Sucks when the iron slips, though.

In that last picture -- *what* are they looking at? (actually, don't answer that question.)

2/08/2006 10:10 AM  
Blogger mama_tulip said...

So what exactly is being advertised in that last picture?

You know what magazine I really love? Maxim.

2/08/2006 10:19 AM  
Blogger Mrs. Harridan said...

I used to read a lot of Maxim and then I realized many of the articles were written by women. They were still good articles, but it just felt wrong. They got a little xenophobic, too, which is so not cool.

But the men's magazines with hot male models? Well, I'm not made of stone. Those are very pleasant.

Oh, Jane Magazine. I got tired of, yes, the inside jokes, the insipid fashion (they claimed to support larger-size models, yet I never saw any in there), and the useless reviews of sexual positions (perhaps I'm a prude, but I think I'd rather get that kind of info from my real girlfriends, or from Sex & The City).

D&G look like they are enjoying this particular go-see quite a bit. :)

2/08/2006 10:30 AM  
Anonymous 1 of 2 Dads in DD said...

Wow! I hadn't seen this last advertisement for, hmmm... dunno, but I'm sure glad I tuned in!

If we still had our subscription to The Advocate I suspect we might have noticed this already.

"D&G, betcha wanna see what we've got here"

Any other caption suggestions?

Now what was it you were talking about...

2/08/2006 10:54 AM  
Blogger Montana1 said...

It's Sports Weekly and The American Prospect for me. Sports and Politics, what could be better? I really don't think I want to read any mag that has ads like the last photo in your post. How do you find time to read with two kids in tow?

I guess it's the extended toilet time that works for you. I've found, however, that the old Bill Cosby scenario rings true: As soon as you sit now for some toilet time, a kid knocks on the door and has a need that just has to be met at that very moment. Geez, and I thought my dad just had a really bad (lifetime) case of constipation.

If you're interested, I'm up and running this week again at:


2/08/2006 11:36 AM  
Blogger Jaye Wells said...

OK considering you posted about Betty Friedan yesterday, this may not be the time for the admission I am about to make. But here goes nothing: I read Playboy.

Believe it or not, I really do read it for the articles. I got a subscription for hubby a couple of years ago for Christmas, and it garnered me the title "Coolest Wife in the World." But once I picked one up and started reading it, hubby had to literally wrestle it out of my hands. Say what you will about the nekkid ladies, the magazine has some of the best articles and interviews in magazine publishing today.

2/08/2006 1:17 PM  
Blogger Arabella said...

I agree completely about _Jane_. Even though I used to love _Sassy_. It's just an entirely different magazine.

I think fashion is currently at its worst in years. Shorts in winter? Skirts that tighten at the knees? WHO wears these?

I love magazines, but my current faves are definitely British tabloids like Hello and OK.

2/08/2006 1:58 PM  
Blogger Mignon said...

Jaye, I hear you. We had one issue of Playboy floating around here for a year, and it always ended up in my magazine pile because Jim couldn't be bothered to read the articles.

Mark, how about "D&G: Are you comfortable in your own skin? How about now?"

Haha Mrs.H, you totally got "go-see" from ANTM, didn't you??!!

I always thought Maxim was kind-of a low-brow version of Esquire, but now Esquire is appealing to the same demographic, they're pretty similar. Esquire just has more expensive clothes.

2/08/2006 2:28 PM  
Blogger mama_tulip said...

I like Maxim because it's funny, and when I'm on the can trying to pinch one out, it keeps me entertained. just brought back a flood of memories for me. I LOVED Sassy. LOVED IT. I subscribed, I pored through it, I worshipped Sassy. *sigh*

2/08/2006 3:28 PM  
Blogger DebbieDoesLife said...

I read an eclectic mix - Southern Living, Family Fun, Newsweek and Texas Monthly. None of 'em have ads like that last one of yours though!

2/08/2006 6:11 PM  
Blogger DoctorMama said...

For those who get annoyed with Jane, you should take a look at Bust. It's way cool.
You know what women's magazine is better than you'd expect? Glamour. The advice -- even the medical advice -- is usually right on.
My mainstays are People and the New Yorker. I can never manage to watch any TV, so People keeps me from seeming like the out of touch freak I really am.

2/08/2006 7:00 PM  
Anonymous LetterB said...

I just want to photoshop "gabbana" and replace it with "banana"

2/08/2006 7:58 PM  
Blogger Mignon said...

letterb, that's hilarious!! I almost want to scan in the other half of the ad and send it to you - would you really do it??

Doc, I've never even heard of Bust. Are you sure you don't mean Busty?

Debbie, is Family Fun really fun? It sounds like something you'd find in the dentist's office... ;)

2/08/2006 8:28 PM  
Anonymous LetterB said...

oh man - I already did it. I couldn't help myself. Behold

2/08/2006 8:38 PM  
Blogger Ditsy Chick said...

Well, I'm placing a phone call right now, that had better be in my mailbox tomorrow or someone is going to be in some shit.

I want to see the Vanity Fair nudie spread, yeah, it's women, yes, they are pale, skinny and have never birthed a child from their loins, but I gotta see it...

Typically, we only get National Geographic. Boring? Not for me, I love it.

2/08/2006 9:01 PM  
Blogger wordgirl said...

Go Viggo! I have three friends who traveled to Crawford to stand with Cindy Sheehan and two familes who helped to line the streets of D.C. after the last presidential election travesty. Along with thousands, they turned their backs on the passing motorcade.

Uh..wait...we're talking about Esquire. Tom Junod rocks the house. David Sedaris, too. Men in suits. "Women We Love" pisses me off a little, but the section where women tell men things they don't know about women always raises my hopes a little. Good writing. Even when they descend to a shallow level (sexist content, etc) the writing is always sharp. Why in HELL can't a women's mag have the same kind of writing? I'm just askin'.

2/08/2006 9:07 PM  
Blogger Mignon said...

letterb, how did you do that?? You are so clever! I think I'm going to send this to Esquire - do you want credit?

dc, who's nekkid in VF?

2/08/2006 9:11 PM  
Anonymous LetterB said...

Tee hee. It's really nothing - leftover skills from my child labor years in the silicon alley sweatshoppes. (Hint: clone stamp tool is your friend). You can credit moi, of course.

2/08/2006 9:28 PM  
Blogger Jaye Wells said...

My only question about the picture is: Does Pottery Barn carry coffee tables like that?
Cause if they do, I am totally getting one for my house. Maybe when he's not holding up my feet, he can pitch in with the laundry.

2/09/2006 7:48 AM  
Blogger The Gradual Gardener said...

Hmmm, a coffee table with a built in spot to stack your napkin rings...

2/09/2006 9:37 AM  
Blogger Tink said...

I think they're inspecting him for pesky towel lint. Wow. One word for the suit model- YUMMY.

I used to read Jane too. Then it became nothing but horrible ads selling horrible products/fashions. If the first 10 pages of a magazine are ads then it's trash in my book.

2/09/2006 10:42 AM  
Blogger Mignon said...

tink, I'm pretty sure that's Christian Bale, and God yes!! SO Yummy! (towel lint -- haha!)

I just keep picturing the conversation between these guys as the photographer's snapping away...
"So whadda y'all think of the Lakers this year? Kobe's looking pretty tough."
"Yeah, I'm liking the Spurs again, though - what? yeah I can spread them a liitle farther..."
"I don't really know how I feel about Avery - oh sorry, I think I farted..."

2/09/2006 1:29 PM  
Anonymous Maggie said...

I loved Sassy, too, and I also heard that Bust is a good mag, though I've never read it.

Love the conversation between the models, Mignon!

2/13/2006 12:47 AM  

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